Lesson Four.

Why does everything have to be so difficult?

Ms. Wet and Ms. Dangerous pool their motivation, ignore their fatigue, and clamber over construction barriers to reach the campus pool.

And still, the doors are locked!

Ms. Wet doesn't allow Ms. Dangerous to turn around and go home; instead, they wait for Instructor C and campus police to pull up in an SUV and unlock the doors.

***

The lesson starts and again they attack the freestyle. From the beginning, both have problems. Ms. Wet feels she doesn't get anywhere when she is swimming, and her solution for coordinating breathing with strokes is just to forego the breathing part. She swims from 5 feet to the shallow end, but remains afraid that she won't be able to hold her breath for the length of the pool. No, she's not quite ready for the deep end yet.

Meanwhile, Ms. Dangerous discovers that her right side is dominant and the left just wants to glide along for the ride. She forces the left side to stroke, swinging the left arm like a club and beating at the water, as gracefully as always.

They take turns practicing, and when it's time for Instructor C to focus her attention on Ms. Wet, Ms. Dangerous entertains herself by doing submerged flips and spinning in circles.

After a few minutes of this exercise, Ms. Wet asks Instructor C about her latest problem: swimming under water. While she practices at the city pool (more on that later) with her daughter, the honest child repeatedly yells, "Mom, your butt is sticking out of the water!"

Instructor C persuades Ms. Wet to dive downward into the 5 ft water and to attempt to swim submerged. Ms. Wet tries, but halfway through her forward bend, uncertainty stops her every time and she kind of belly flops into the water. With that entry, there's no chance of breaking the surface.

"Ah," considers Instructor C, "You're swimming like a barge. How do you do that?"

Ms. Dangerous pauses mid-flip to ponder that very Pittsburgh-ian image. "I think you look more like a shark," she offers helpfully, "Imagine your cranium as a dorsal fin."

"I know what will help!" says Instructor C, "We need to learn to dive!"

"Ummmm..." mumbles Ms. Wet.

Ms. Dangerous does a flip and flashes a thumbs-up.

"Next week: the deep end!" proclaims Instructor C.

"Uhhh!!" mumbles Ms. Wet, looking stricken.

"YES!" applauds Ms. Dangerous.